|YE OFFICIAL SERTOMA NEWSLETTER
September 15, 2021
Mary Marana visited with us today as the speaker presenting information about the Crisis Line Referral Service. She has been Director since 2006. The Crisis line is the “someone” you can turn to when “nobody” understands or when “everyone” is too busy to listen.
The referral service provides a free, confidential, nonjudgmental, 24-hour crisis line to everyone in Aitkin, Cass, Crow Wing, Morrison, Todd and Wadena Counties. Dedicated caring volunteers are available to help you share your hurts and fears before they become a crisis, as well as to help those in crisis get help. Their Mission”Crisis Line aims to empower people to help themselves, through support and encouragement. It was established in 1988 in response to the significant number of teen suicides and suicide attempts. Since then they have grown into a crisis line that assists people of all age groups and from all walks of life.Their mission is “to provide confidential and anonymous telephone support to people in distress and crisis, and to serve as a lifeline for positive change by connection clients to area resources and giving support and encouragement. Their volunteers are culturally and economically diverse, caring, compassionate and skilled people provided with specialized training and continuing education programs. Their goal is to provide these services through collaborations and operate as a fiscally sound, responsible and cost-effective organization.
How we can help you? You will always get a voice on the other end of the line. Crisis Line is answered 24 hours a day everyday.
Crisis Line volunteers are trained to listen first to each caller and provide referrals to resources.
Crisis Line is an Anonymous Service and conversations are handled in a confidential manner.
Our mission is to empower people to help themselves, through support and encouragement.
If you are feeling a little blue, a little lonely, a little frustrated or just need a friend to talk to, Crisis Line volunteers are ready to listen.
Mary was very interested to find out that 2020 was not a higher year for suicides but there was a lot of anxiety, stress and short tempers, domestic abuse. Training THIS Friday for volunteers with flexible times. She was giving away funny $100 bills for people who paid attention. She made a not so happy speech into a positive experience for all those in attendance. Joe Enge won knowing the highest call volume is spring in Minnesota and Thursday is the highest volume day. The second highest is in the fall. JD won a wonderful little book called “Thinking of you” John Raboin won one. Bob Nibbe got the last one but he was only close. 2019 was the lowest for number of calls and the highest for suicides. Mary stressed their work to teach people about improving their mental health. Eric won a hundred for remembering when the training was. Nick got his for knowing what was on our free pens. Sertoma helped the organization print their manual. She talked about how stressful calls can be when literally the person on the end of the line is a vet with a pistol pointed at their head and giving you a limited time to convince them to not continue. The volunteer has to get them to the point where they can be set up with a professional trained in emergency. Mary was very open and honest about how difficult her job really is and how difficult it is to be a volunteer. Many of their volunteers are students studying law enforcement. Their motive is to gain an experience that will help them with their jobs in the future.
She then went on to Crisis Line’ work in the schools where they actually work with students immediately who reveal that they are contemplating suicide The most at risk person is the exact opposite of what you would think. Reaching out to older white males and vets who have never been deployed is a serious concern for Crisis line right now. Mental Illness is occurring with younger and younger children. Self medicating for older kids in school is a serious issue. Mary thanked Sertoma for their support and encouraged people to get trained. Beth won a beautiful plaque for her answer to a question. She gave everyone a pen, a brochure, magnets and very valuable cards to distribute when needed. Go out and really listen to the people you meet. She acknowledged the part that CTC hosts their office space. She concluded with THE CRISIS LINE IS THERE 24 HOURS A DAY. She also urged people to go out and be randomly positive because it makes such a difference.
|July Board Report
Click on the links to read
|Wed Oct 6 Sertoma will have a booth at the Chili Cookoff–Russ Hale and JD need help No meeting that week.
Ditch Pick Tuesday Sept 21st tentatively–food and prizes and a really social time. Beth has let us know unless we get a good turnout, this will be the end of a very long tradition for Brainerd Area Sertoma Club. It is back to Schroeders–thanks Trevor . Prizes, bring your phone 4:30 responsible kids welcome.
Candace is looking for monster sponsors for the Haunted Trail.
ROOKIE PARTY IS COMING!! ROOKIE PARTY IS COMING SAVE OCT 7th It is going to be at the Arb. They have a great new deal for family membership. Y. . Costume party with cash prizes throughout the night. See event flyers for new details. Sign up soon with Lisa Walters
Hearing and Vision update from Nikki–. She will know by next Friday. Be ready to volunteer. We have five schools signed up waiting on Pequot. Oct 7th Forest View BHS looking for volunteers.
Stride and See Saturday September 25th “A Scavenger hunt run to celebrate the Brainerd
|Blue Ticket Winner|
|John Raboin for the golf fund|
|Would have been Kevin Donnay|
|* Everyone is encouraged to bring potential members to a Sertoma meeting with the Club picking up the cost. However, you will be billed $11.00 for any other guests.|
As greeter you have several duties. You need to arrive about 10 minutes early. It is your job to greet people, help them find their badges and sell them a ticket if they wish to participate. The money collected must be divided by the Greeters equally–half goes to the Current Club Treasurer for the social committee and half goes to the Club President along with the bucket of tickets. Greeter duties now include handing out the volunteer cards to everyone as they come in the door. They will still be collected in the bucket with the badges or can be submitted to the treasurer. Be there by 11:45 and call somebody to substitute for you if you can’t be there.
|Sertoman of the Day|
| Time to wish our hard working social chairman a very happy anniversary.
|The newsletter lady paid a wonderful happy fine. Even though she loves Jim’s Electric, her major problem with her circuit in the garage turned out to be something easy to fix with the flick of a button.
Welcome back to Sertoma Kevin Goedker!!!!!!!!! and Shannon Wussow
Prayers for John Raboin’s office manager–in hospital with a serious covid case.
The newsletter lady is attending the rookie party as a photographer-note camera. She is not wearing her bear suit, or her toga left over from her days as a teacher when Motley Faculty Christmas parties were always themed dress up.
Pam is now officially creating a Sertoma Speaker of the Year Award. We have two nominees so far Rick Besmehn and Mary.
Mary had 22 questions : and she spoke so “It was all about Mary today! Thank you Mary for all the gifts and the wonderful presentation on Crisis Line and the hilariously fun answer that riddle sergeant’s exam. Only three people got anything correct.
KevinS- in a year, there are 12 months Seven months have 31 days How many month have 28: they all do
Chuck -You[‘re a cyclist in a cross-country race. Just before crossing the finish line you overtake the person in second place.In what place did you finish? Second
Kevin A man pushes his car into a hotel and tells the owner he is bankrupt ..Why? He is playing monopoly
Eric ****** How far can a deer run into the woods. Halfway the rest of the time he is running out
Pam F On y way to St Ives I met a man with seven wifes. Each sack had seven cats. Each cat had seven kits. Kits, cats sacks and wives how many were going to St Ives Only one me
Shannon+ The number 8,549,176,320 is a unique number. What is so special about it? It is the only number with every digit arranged in alphabetical order
Nick****You’re in a cabin and it is pitch black. Which do you lilght with your one match: the newspaper,the lamp, the candle or the ire. You light the match irst
Joe A man let home running. He ran a ways and then turned left, ran the same distance and turned left again, ran the same distance and turned left again. When he got home there were two masked men. Who were they? the catcher and the umpire
Pam S Give me food and I will live, give me water and I will die. What am I? A fire
Tim What has a spine but no brainerd A book
Beth What gets wetter an wetter the more it dries ? A towel
Bob How can a man go eight days without sleep? He sleeps at night
Rick A man was outside taking a walk when it starte to rainThe man didn’t have an umbrella and he wasn’t wearing a hat. His clothes go soake yet not a single hair on his head got wet, How could this happen? The man was totally bald
Jeff What goes up an down but remains in the same place the stars
Jim A truck driver is going down a one-way street the wrong way and passes at least 10 cops. Why isn’t she arrested She is walking on the sidewalk
Les What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing An elephant’s shadow
John If you have me you want to share me. I you share me, you haven’t gotten me. What am I? A secret
JD +What occurs once in every minute, twice in every moment but never in a thousand years? The letter m
Nikki *** A man stands on one side of a river, his dog on the other. The man calls his dog who immediately crosses the river without getting wet or using a bridge of a boatl How did the dog do it? The river was frozen
Happy Fines Beth is happy for her wedding in Hawaii-see pic. Boys and Berries is opening for pumpkin. Pam F called Jim G and they sent someone the next morning to fix the outlet and of course it was working. This was after Pam S had to admit an little elf from Camp showed up yesterday and fixed her dumb girl electrical issue.
|Sertoma Kids Bragging Rights
|This Weeks Humor|
|So there’s this one kid at a costume party and the host ask what he was dressed up as. The kid told him that he dressed up as a harp, and the host told him that his costume is too small to be a harp.The kid then said, “Are you calling me a lyre?”
A couple was invited to a swanky costume party. Unfortunately, the wife came down with a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early enough, decided to go the party. Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, and copping a little touch here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished…Naturally, (since he was her husband.) Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed. So off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behaviour. She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had. He said: “Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you’re not there.” “Did you dance much ?” “You know, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Browning and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But you’re not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to.”I invited my buddy to a costume party and he said he was going as his dad.He didn’t show up
This year in Heaven the Christmas celebration was also a costume party. Everyone dressed up.
Many people came as movie characters, from Gandalf the Grey (and White) to Jason Bourne to Black Widow to Harry Potter. Alan Rickman went as Hans Gruber, which made St. Peter exclaim “See, Die Hard IS a Christmas movie!” St. Peter was dressed as the “Fragile” lamp from A Christmas Story. Moses showed up as Charlton Heston’s version of himself, while Charlton Heston dressed up as an ape. Ruth Bader Ginsburg came as Hermione Granger. (Although she insisted that she was dressed as the book character, not the movie character, which explained the teeth.)
There were also some great couple’s costumes. Alex Trebek and Sean Connery dressed up as each other and re-enacted bits from the Celebrity Jeopardy sketches. The Wright brothers dressed up as the Super Mario Brothers. Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds came as Captain Kirk and Mister Spock. Prince dressed up as Dave Chappelle’s version of Rick James and David Bowie came as “Super Freakonomics.”
Naturally, everyone was looking for the guest of honor. If anyone would have a fantastic costume, it would be Jesus. However, try as they might, no one could figure out Jesus’ costume among the multitudes of party guests. There were, of course, plenty of people who dressed as Jesus, and some wondered if Jesus had gone full meta. He didn’t, but as it turned out Charlie Chaplin did dress up as Jesus and placed third in the Jesus Look-a-Like contest.
Finally, as the party was drawing to a close, it was time for everyone to unmask. Joan of Arc was the one dressed as Bigfoot. Alan Turing was Predator. Richard Pryor was the Burning Bush. Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, who had long since made up and become the best of friends, were the unicorn. Eventually there was only one costume left.
As Jesus pulled off the Matt Damon mask, everyone realized that Christ was Bourne on Christmas Day.
Stay tuned for more costume party jokes–make sure you sign up for the Rookie Party. Maybe these jokes will inspire a “costume” for you!!
|News From Old Friends|
|Time for a repeat shout out to Andrea Holmes–happy birthday
Both Karen Owen and her daughter Missy are past Sertoma members. Happy Birthday Missy.
|Notes from your President JD Berns
Roster Updates/Change of Information
Send any changes of business, address, phone or email. The
roster will be updated and published at the beginning of each
Program/Sertoman of the Month
If you are not receiving the newsletter notification or the
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